We gain very deep insights about ourselves when we practise mindfulness.
Along with many other things we learn about ourselves our impulse control is one of them.
Ram dass has a great saying and that is. “If you think you are enlightened, spend a week with your family”.
That really points to what we are talking about here. We are focused on impulse control in our relationships.
Impulse control is the control of your interpersonal impulses and these impulses differ in each relationship.
Our Impulse to say the first funny thing that pops into our heads. when we are having a funny conversation with our good friend may be very fast.
However our interpersonal Impulse control may be substantial when dealing with an overbearing work manager. Our impulses may be even shorter when trying to control our children or dealing with our pets in the home.
It may not be necessary to monitor our interpersonal impulse control. if there is no negative implications. However when our personal relationships are suffering impulse control then becomes a very important factor.
This can best be seen in intimate relationships were communication breaks down. Either when we say whatever we want or when we engage in the opposite extreme and shut off. Remember our impulses to not communicate are impulses none the less.
So how do we practise interpersonal impulse control? With mindfulness of course!
Becoming aware of our emotions reactivity, attitudes and physical stress. Will always give us a gauge of how impulsive we are feeling. Simply noticing where our impulse control threshold is sitting. Gives us the opportunity to decide if we want to react to it or not.
We may not always win the battle but one thing we do know is mindfulness brings us to the table so to speak to make these changes.
Keep in mind the decision to not react to an Impulse is hard in any context. I’m this blog i am only talking about impulse control in regards to interpersonal communication.
For more information about Mindfulness, please visit http://www.realitybasedmindfulness.com.au.